he had a job. at a plastic manufacturer. he was also selling marijuana. (while on probation for something with guns, possession, and wreckless endangerment.) he quit that job because his friend got fired. he became full time stay at home dad, while i went back to working 40hours a week retail, as i had done my entire pregnancy. i made him stop selling drugs. used baby as the excuse why he needed to. he did not do this in my apartment by the way and he didnt keep anything here. i told him i felt in danger. he's a good guy. he stopped. he has stopped smoking too bc of the chance of a drug test prior to employment because thats what hes doing, looking for a job. sort of. hes living at his grandmothers now... he isnt watching our sweet girl so much anymore because he pisses me off and i dont let him, and now hes refusing to since hes dumped me.
next problem: whos going to watch her when im at work if my parents cant???
I feel terrible that I have to even go to work. I would kill to be a stay at home mom. I want to teach her things and do things with her and take her places, I want to show her the world and watch each of those tooths pop in and see her first steps, because they're coming! and I am so proud of her and I love her more than anything! And its okay if dadda leaves because we still got each other and my family, and thats the whole world. she'll always be happy and have the things she needs, except dadda.
Maybe we can share her. Dude if we dont get back together then I dont ever want to see him again. He can fuck out of our lives.
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